Sunday, June 3, 2012

The 30 Day Challenge - Day 2

Day 2 : List 3 Fears and Explain How They Became Fears

#1 - Death.
 A -Losing my husband. Early. I know when we are like 90, what will happen will happen, but everyday I am so fearful of something happening to J on his way to/from work and not getting to see him again.
B - My son. He's my son. He's supposed to live even longer than me. He's so perfect and I know I would go crazy with out my baby. This goes for all future children as well.
C - My parents. I know they are getting older, and beginning to face health problems and such, but I want them to be here and see my children grow up, to see my siblings future children arrive and grow up. To become great-grandparents one day.
D - The entire rest of my family. Because.
I really can not cope with loss and sadness well, at all. Even after almost 5 years, I am still upset over losing my Nini.

~ On to lighter fears ~
#2 - Snakes. They are nasty. And creepy and scary. They eat mice (which in theory is fine, they just don't eat the ones around here, apparently). They just freak me (and the husband) out! When I was younger and would mow the grass at my parents house, I would run over & back over them repeatedly. But I had to lift my feet in the air (on the mower), because I didn't want to get snake bits on me. And I wouldn't stop over them, I was afraid they would (somehow) manage to not get hit with the blades, then wait until the tractor for me to get off, then sneak attack.
(I'm actually just not one for any critter with the potential to kill me. Snake, spider, ticks, bees, rabid animals ...)

#3 - Flying / heights. I have no real desire to fly anywhere anyway (especially with all the security stuff now). I just am not a huge fan of heights, and I know me and airplanes wouldn't do well together. 
I am also a bit fearful when just driving places. People drive like loonies now, too busy to pay attention to the road and in too big a hurry to beat you to the red light.

~Bonus fear : When I was pregnant, I was worried/fearful of needing a C-section, medical interventions or not being able to have my natural labor. While everything worked out perfectly this time, I worry it won't for my next children. I very much want to have 100% natural labors with each child.

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